Make Sure That You Don't Become "Bridezilla" While You Are Planning Your Wedding

Bridezilla is a term that was invented by people to refer to the unreasonable actions of a bride-to-be. However I feel that this is being a bit too hard on the brides as - let’s face it -  it’s natural for a bride to let off a little steam occasionally, when the pressure of wedding planning gets too much. Bridezilla is formed when your usual sweet-natured person changes into a monster during the build-up to her wedding. I bet all of us know one or two brides who became obsessed with their wedding planning that they completely lost the plot and forgot why they were getting married in the first place.  In the United Kingdom there is something affecting brides, a disease that is known called ‘Competitive Wedding Syndrome’: symptoms of which can apparently lead to stress, arguments and overspending.

The majority of brides that too part in the study admitted that they are ok with making unnecessary sacrifices and overspend just to have a "perfect wedding". Over 60% of the ladies did admit that they took up second jobs just to help pay for the event. The brides have a strong desire for the guests to rate their wedding a the best of the best. Look I am not saying that you shouldn't spoil yourself on this special day, oh no. I am just saying that observe some of the actions that you take. The stress will make you shout at your husband to be and get you in all sorts of fights with your family, in-laws, minister and so on. So ask yourself is it worth it. A couple of years ago weddings were not so expensive. In fact all you needed was a fruit cake, hire a wedding venue and invite guests. Nowadays  you have carrot cakes, French croquembouche, chocolate, fruit, fruit + chocolate cake.. you name it. Think of anything and I bet there is a baker out there who can make it for you. How do you pick the best without going insane?

After the cake is done then you will need to plan what dessert is going to be served with the cake (or perhaps with a chocolate fountain…). Another example is the table decor. There was a time when table cloths were only white, now there are green , yellow, red, purple, orange "(sound like I am singing about the rainbow here)". How do you make a decision without turning into a fierce fire breathing dragon. As if that's not enough there is the stress of planning for the big day. Who does what? & when? Your hubby wants to have some crazy bachelors in Jozi (oh oh more stress) and your Wedding Planner's cell phone always goes to voice mail (you are almost going mad). I heard somewhere that it can take as many as 250 hours of a well-organised person’s time to arrange the `average’ wedding. That translates to nearly six working weeks — not easy when you are working full-time.

So how to you prevent yourself from being Bridezilla

So how do you prevent yourself from becoming totally obsessed with the planning of your wedding, or succumbing to ‘Competitive Wedding Syndrome’?

First you need to set at least a day week to spend time alone with your fiancé, during which you do not talk about the wedding at all! Rather focus on your relationship and your life together after the big day. Secondly, try as far as possible to not become a martyr and attempt to do it all yourself — learn to delegate. That why you have those "girlfriends" Friend and family are always willing to help you when it comes to planning your wedding and this makes them become more involved in your life. Meet regularly for updates with your delegates as this will give you peace of mind and prevent you from breaking down. The last thing you want to be doing on your wedding day is running around, Nokia in hand, commanding everyone to do this and that. Don’t laugh: it happens most of the time!

And please ladies let get things straight. There is nothing called a "perfect wedding". Get that idea out of your mind.  I have been to weddings that were wonderful and many that were stunning, but behind the scenes there were almost always hitches.Aiming for a perfect wedding will lead to stress, sleepless-nights and chances are your hubby will divorce you even before he signs the wedding certificate. A perfect wedding according to me is a wedding in which you and you man celebrate your union whether its in a 5 star hotel or under a tree. If there is love and comfort then that's a perfect wedding.

There are somethings that are beyond your control such as when Eskom decides to cut electricity on your special day or the weather. So to prevent any mental break-down you always need to have a Plan B

I can go on forever here but I will end here. Have a good day and please don't turn into Bridezilla on Friday the 13th.